My Dream Job Turned Nightmare Part 2 (A Second Chance!)

The moral of Part One was to follow your instincts. If you’re going home from a new job every day crying and reaching for alcohol, it’s probably not the right job for you! Even if you dreamed about it, prayed for it, made a whole new budget for your life based around how much money you’d be making at it. I made the right decision by quitting and I don’t regret it**.

I have been quieter than usual this week because Part Two is happening this Saturday. After my absolute nightmare of a job experience earlier this year, I decided that that program might not have been the best fit for me, but that I still deserve a chance at being a real teacher.

So on Saturday I take my Florida Teacher Certification Exam for Elementary Education: Kindergarten through 6th grade. It consists of 4 subtests, Language Arts, Math, Science, and Social Sciences. It’s not that any one of these tests is particularly hard, but for Science and Social Sciences especially, I feel a bit overwhelmed at how I’m supposed to study for 55-60 questions about a very broad subject. But all I can do is study and try my best! These past few weeks have seen me taking just about every practice test available online.

Ever resilient, I developed this plan right after the other job fizzled out but when COVID lockdown happened, all testing was put on hold. Back in April when I tried to schedule my test, the first available date wasn’t until November 13. As that is far past the starting date for the school year, I was going to just forget about it. But, because Florida is ridiculous, they ended up easing restrictions for the pandemic and opening more test dates and a few weeks ago I was able to schedule this one, exactly a month before the new school year is scheduled to start. And a bonus for my new budget-friendly frame of mind: All exams scheduled before July 31 are 100% free (a savings of $140). So what do I have to lose?

Teachers are notoriously underpaid and there is a lot of controversy about the risks of going back to schools right now (especially in Florida) but the sad part is that a starting teacher’s salary is still twice what I currently make! No matter what your budget is, imagine the difference twice as much money could make in your life. And did I mention the free health care?! And the Teachers Union? And the fact that it would still be less risk than my current job because it doesn’t involve drooly, snotty, cuddly toddlers? Especially after the past two weeks I’ve had dealing with COVID at my workplace, I am so ready for a change, and this would be such a drastic improvement.

It at least can’t be as bad as the last one, right?

The other thing to consider with that nightmare job is how much I learned in just those few days. I figured out that one of the most important things to know is the chain of command. I learned some specifics about what schools in my area have the strengths and support that I’m looking for as a new teacher. I learned to insist on a thorough tour and the chance to set up my classroom before the first day. I learned some huge red flags and not to be afraid to speak up if I feel over my head, like I don’t have what I need to succeed, or like no one seems to know what’s going on. And I know that I can trust my gut when things don’t feel right.

I’m honestly terrified about the exam on Saturday. For a while I thought it wasn’t going to happen in time for the new school year so I didn’t even care how it went, but now I’ve gotten it into my head that I would make a really amazing kindergarten teacher, or that it could be really fun to work with older kids and inspire them with a lifelong love for reading. I’m trying to find the right balance between lots of studying, self care, and not burning myself out.

Wish me luck!!!

**Except for just a tiny bit because if I had stuck it out for just 3-4 weeks longer I’d be getting paid my full salary to stay home and teach a few lessons online every week instead of putting my health at risk, working 9-6 every weekday for 75% of the money. And I’d have healthcare! The timing absolutely sucked, but again, I still think I made the right choice for myself. That job was an absolute nightmare and you don’t have to continue with a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it.